10:30pm
We held a meeting at 7:00 pm with Jay's primary physician, Dr. Chiu. Jay's mother Betty, sister Julie, and I (Jay's brother-in-law) were present with other family members, along with Jay's Pastor, Paul and Jay's close friend and church Elder, Bill.
In light of Jay's devastating brain injury, Dr. Chiu confirmed that Jay has no real hope for recovery. We discussed Jay's wishes among us. Jay's mom, Betty said that Jay has told her several times that he is not afraid to die because he knows he will be with the Lord. His sister, Julie noted that Jay has always been very proud of his independence and freedom, and would hate to have to be cared for by someone, to not be able to work and to not have his freedom. Jay's good friend, Bill echoed those sentiments, as did others in our family. Dr. Chiu wisely noted that these comments gave him insight as to what Jay's views of the situation would be if he could speak for himself. He observed that our group of 8 was in unison, with no disagreement on our perceptions of what Jay would want for himself.
So, tomorrow we will let go of Jay and allow him to go home to God.
Tomorrow (Wednesday), there will be unlimited visiting allowed to Jay in his ICU room if you would like to stop in to see and pray over him. The only times that visiting cannot be allowed is from 7-8 am and 7-8 pm, as that is the nurses' shift change time and they must have absolute concentration on their work.
Tomorrow night at 9:00 pm there will be a simple prayer service led by Pastor Paul in the chapel of Methodist Hospital (go in the main entrance and ask for directions if you wish to come.) Afterwards, a small group of immediate family will go to be with Jay as they disconnect his life supports. He will remain on a morphine drip to ensure he experiences no pain until the end comes.
If you would like to see Jay tomorrow, please be sure to stop in a say your goodbyes well before the 9:00 pm service. Again, visiting will be allowed all day except during the nurses' shift change, and we are sure many people will want to come by. He is still in an operating ICU and only a few people can go in at a time. Please be patient if the nurses ask you to wait.
Please check back to this web site in a few days for information on funeral services.
THANK YOU ALL for your love and concerns and prayers for Jay and for us. We have been truly overwhelmed by the outpouring of blessings from each and every one of you.
Please pray that Jay will go peacefully, quietly and quickly to our Lord, and especially keep his mother, Betty and sister, Julie in your prayers. While this is hard on all of us, as you can imagine, this is hardest on them.
Victor Polek
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Julie & Family,
ReplyDeleteRon and I as well as our church are praying for the whole family. We are
praying for God's will in this situation and for strength and comfort for
all of you all as you wait through this trying time.
We love you all!
Vicki
Jay,
ReplyDeleteYou are such a unique and very special person. We know how much God must love you.
We love you and pray for you.
Your cousins,
Ted, MaryBeth and family
Jay's family...
ReplyDeleteThis has to be a very hard decision to make. You are wise in thinking of Jay and his wishes. We are praying for God's help to give you strength and comfort.
Love to all of you,
Jerry & Edna
Julie,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sad for you as you do what you have to do. Please know we are
praying for peace that passes all understanding for you and your mom!
Love you!
Vicki
Dear Jay's Family,
ReplyDeleteWe have had the privilege of knowing Jay for over 25 years. Since we moved from So Cal, we have not kept in contact with him, but last year we were able to invite him to our home to spend 2 days with us. He was able to meet our children, play Yahtzee, and get caught up with each other. What a wonderful reunion we had! Jay always remember all of our birthdays and our anniversary, which made each of us feel special. We have great memories from our college group days at SMCC. He loved Jesus, and was not afraid to share that love. We are praying for you during this awful time. If you get this message in time, please let Jay know that the Wunderly family loves him, and look forward to our next reunion with him in our heavenly home.
God's Grace to all of you,
Eric & Peggy Wunderly
Julie, Vic, Betty, & Kenny,
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to imagine the strength you must have to let Jay go. It certainly can only be done with a great faith in God. A faith I know you all have. It is a faith that will show you Jay’s gratitude for your act of kindness to him in allowing him to remain an independent soul. It is a faith that you will know that Jay has been reborn into an eternal life with Almighty God. It is this faith that will see you through this time and let you celebrate Jay’s life with honor and pride.
Your friend in faith & life,
Vince B.
How wonderful to know that the Father has never left Jay and is holding him tightly and whispering words of comfort and strength.
ReplyDeleteMay your family know the Father's presence, peace, strength and comfort during this difficult time.
Love, Diane McConnell
How unexpected and sad all of this is. Jay was a very good and religious man. He was also a person I could always rely on. The earlier comment that Jay felt he was not afraid to die seems especially right because Jay knew he had lived a good life and was assured a reward afterward.
ReplyDeleteNed Mead
Betty and I thank God for the memory of Jay. He always brought a smile to our faces and joy to our hearts. We are praying for Jay's mom, Betty and his sister and brother-in-law.
ReplyDeleteBob and Betty Nease
Jay, thank you for being such a wonderful cousin to visit us when my sister and I were young. We always enjoyed your visits and trips to Marineworld. It made our summers that much more special. The last time I saw you was at my wedding and I greatly appreciated your attendance and blessings. May you find peace and comfort on your journey to the Lord. My daughter's school will say a special intention for you at mass on Friday.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Matt Swanson and Family
Jay-
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and prayers are with you and the family.
Jake Vigil Jr
We praise God for bringing Jay into our lives through SMCC. We have been friends for over 37 years. He is truly a blessing to us all with his warmth and friendliness. All of you are in our prayers. We regret we cannot greet you personally. Cherri, Loren, Patrick and John Gardner
ReplyDeleteJulie, Victor and family,
ReplyDeleteI have just read the blog today and the news regarding Jay. Please know that we have been praying for Jay and his family for a miraculous recovery. It seems as if God's plans are different and he is waiting for Jay to come home. Though it is hard on us here on earth, it is awesome that a family member will soon be face to face with Jesus. We will continue to pray for comfort and peace for you and your family.
Love, Russ and Linda Barbarino
Dear Family Of Jay:
ReplyDeleteI will be unable to attend the service Wednesday night, But my heart and my prayers are with you.
I know that jay will soon be resting in the loving and comforting arms of Jesus, But I am very sorry to
lose this friend, and i will miss his quick wit. But I am thankful that God brought Jay into my life for many years and my life is richer because. Jay touched so many lives and though he will be out of our presence
he will always be in our hearts. To you his dear family my love, and my prayers.
God Bless All Of you and may God's love comfort you.
Love Fred DeVito
We are so sorry. We have been praying for Jay. Jay has dog sit for us for years.
ReplyDeleteStu and Judy Krieger